Photo by freestocks on Unsplash
This cycle of poems was written by Megan Powell du Toit as a reflection on an Easter miscarriage she experienced.
The Long Friday
Sitting at table with friends
An unanticipated last supper
It began
On a Thursday evening
With an unwelcome prescience
We turned our faces toward the hospital
I sat, life ebbing out between my legs
A tragedy so commonplace
I warranted no special attention
When my time came
They said that the end was inevitable
And they sent my loved ones away
Martyrlike, I blessed their going
Speaking words of love to be passed on
And after all, I could pray
I asked that this baby
Not be taken from me
Pleaded while my blood fell to the ground
As the hours passed into Friday
Sure my first unborn lay dead, I cried
My God My God why have you forsaken me
The Friday was the one we call Good
And in my child bereft desolation
a still small voice “I sent my only son”
They laid her in a pan
And took her out of my sight
God’s tears and mine flowed mingled
Megan Powell du Toit
Sabbatum Sanctum
Saturday dawned to the continued presence of death
and to an ache of absence
Tomb filled
Womb emptied
An age long pregnant anticipation unborn in blood
hopes laughed at by heaven
Tomb full
Womb empty
The day of rest become a day of pause. Months pass.
Suspended on a restless sabbath
Tomb still full
Womb still empty
I sit in the locked room of my fear, doubting
At the door, prayers pile up
For an empty tomb
And a quickened womb
Megan Powell du Toit
Sunday in the Flesh
Friday, I fell
Saturday, I bled
Sunday, I arise
Friday, pain is born
Saturday, waiting borne
Sunday, hope reborn
Friday, baby dead
Saturday, no child
Sunday, two sons
and a son of man
My second child, first born
Born on a Friday
Answers that day’s pain
Resurrection birthed
In the pervasive presence of a teen
Lanky limbs and scattered belongings
A messy love
My third child, early born
Born on a Saturday
Because he could not wait
Resurrection embodied
In the me mirror likeness of a child
Clever comebacks and private emotions
An obstinate blessing
Crucified son, Christ risen
Risen on a Sunday
Hope alive in human flesh
Resurrection, death defied
The Bright Morning Star holds my beloved
To this I cling, in the restless wait
Love always rises
Megan Powell du Toit
Rev Dr Megan Powell du Toit is Senior Pastor of Rouse Hill Baptist Church in Sydney and the Baptist half of the WADR Project Team.
thewadrproject.com 